“Suit or Tuxedo – what should I wear for my wedding?”
Suit or Tux? In over a decade working with wedding clients, this is the most common question we get. And the answer is – yes, you guessed it – it depends! While some may say that a traditional tuxedo is a must for any groom, there are often exceptions based on the vibe and surroundings of your unique occasion.
First, what's the difference?
The two are closer cousins than most people think, but a few details separate them.
Lapels: Tuxedos traditionally have satin or grosgrain lapels (peak or shawl). Suits have lapels made from the same fabric as the jacket.
Trousers: A tux has a satin stripe down the outer leg seam. A suit doesn't.
Buttons and trim: Tuxedo buttons are usually covered in matching satin. Suit buttons are plain, often horn or plastic.
Accessories: A tux calls for a bow tie (or a very sharp long tie, if you're breaking convention), a dress shirt with a pleated or piqué front, and patent or polished black shoes. A suit leaves you more room to play: ties, pocket squares, brown leather, even no tie at all.
Timeless Black Tux
Satin Shawl Lapel with Black Satin Accents
The tux is built on one idea: timeless formality. The suit is built on another: elegant versatility.
The most important factor: the picture on your mantle
The memory of your wedding day will live gloriously in your head regardless of what you wear. But as many married couples can attest, there’s a special picture that will sit prominently in your house for decades and will probably become a cherished heirloom one day. The most important question you should ask yourself is:
What would you like to memorialize in this time capsule, for yourself or for your next generations?
Before considering “what fits with the venue?” or “how formal is the event?”, think about what you’d like to see in one of the most important pictures of your life.
What’s the bride wearing?
The formality and “vibe” of the bride and groom’s attire must align. We’ve seen unfortunate scenarios where the groom’s suit made him look like he was merely escorting the bride to the ball as opposed to participating in the ceremony himself! And vice versa, we’ve seen a groom in a black 3-piece tuxedo showing up to a wooded, rustic wedding alongside the bride in a Boho-chic cropped gown.
Choose a tuxedo if your partner is wearing a formal gown, e.g. cathedral train, heavy beadwork, or voluminous ball gown.
Choose a suit if your partner is wearing a less formal/traditional ensemble, e.g. drop-waist, mid length or relaxed chic.
The main takeaway is that the couple should talk and coordinate – and this doesn’t need to mean sneaking a peak at the dress!
Consider the venue and environment
A useful rule of thumb: your outfit should look like it belongs in the photos of the place. If the background is stone columns and chandeliers, lean tux. If it's wildflowers and string lights, lean suit.
Time of day also matters! Traditional etiquette reserves tuxedos for after 6 pm, and while few couples follow that to the letter, the spirit still helps. Evening light and candlelit receptions flatter dark, crisp black or midnight blue. Daytime light, especially in summer, flatters lighter fabrics and colors: a tan, sage, or light grey suit in linen or a lightweight wool can look stunning and keep you from overheating at the altar.
In winter, either works beautifully. A deep navy or charcoal three-piece suit brings warmth, while a velvet dinner jacket (technically a tuxedo cousin) is a showstopper.
A couple other considerations
If you’re still undecided after considering the above, perhaps these two (minor) points can tip the scale:
1. The Groom Stands Out. If there’s a wedding party, the groom should look a little different from everyone else. If your groomsmen are in suits, a tuxedo sets you apart without a word. However, if you choose to wear a suit alongside your groomsmen, ways to stand out include:
a. Wearing a different color
b. Upgrading to a 3-piece suit, and/or
c. Adding different accents/accessories
2. Ease of Reuse. Most guys agree that suits are more easily repurposed than tuxedos. If you don’t wear formal attire often, a custom navy or charcoal wedding suit can be handy for that (once-a-year) special occasion for the next decade. Simply swap out the shirt and/or tie, and you’re good to go.
The bottom line
A tuxedo gives you timeless formality and an effortless sense of occasion. A suit gives you personality, flexibility, and a piece of your wardrobe that lives on after the big day. Pick the one that matches your venue, complements your partner, and makes you stand a little taller, because the best-dressed groom is the one who feels completely like himself.
